I tinkered on yesterday’s blog post for more than 6 hours, and it left me feeling so high and steamy and sitting in pussy juice, and counting down the minutes until my husband would resurface at our home.

But when he did, I realized he and I weren’t on the same page anymore. He’d spent the day stressing about various work projects, shuffling between meetings and trips to buy material, and I spent my day thinking and writing about sex.

It was eerily similar to the Saturday that I spent on my back with my legs spread soaking up his cum in my bed with the laptop open jotting down my feelings and thoughts like a moment by moment commentator.

By the time he arrived home on that day, I was this oversexed crazy woman and he wasn’t all that interested in any of it.

Oh, dear reader, the ebbs and flows of life. I swear it’s the magic of the middle, the balance, the caring but not too much, that makes us feel good. The edges are where we learn the most, though.

As if our different desire levels wasn’t enough, my husband went and hurt his back in martial arts last night too, signaling a definite end to any idea I had about romance. And he hurt his back badly! As I write today, he’s still laying on a heating pad nestled up in our goddess palace wincing at the pain and alternating positions to find relief.

In the 7 years I’ve known him, I can only think of one time he didn’t get up to work on a workday because of illness. He’s a very healthy man with an incredible ability to never catch any cold, flu or stomach bug that goes around our home. He’s like Mr. Invincible! But the fighting last night in jui jitsu class pulled a muscle right there in his lower back.

He’s crabby too and asking me to do things like turn the fan on, turn the light off, get him some water, make him some food. He threw his clothes all over the room and has wet towels everywhere. The housekeeper just left and the house is already a mess. And I feel completely invisible to boot, like his pain is blocking my presence. He finally took some Tylenol this morning and it seems to have taken the edge off at least.

I instantly thought about my friends who deal with sickly spouses and family members on a daily basis. I’m not going to say that I can’t be a caregiver, obviously I’ll do what I need to do for those I love, but I will admit that it’s not my preferred way to spend time with people. I found myself already bickering with him, annoyed by his lack of sweetness, and it’s only been one night. I know he’s in pain, but damn he didn’t even say good morning. Needless to say, neither of us are used to this.

Of course, I haven’t orgasmed in three days now either and didn’t get my daily dose of his manly medicine. I’m going on 24 hrs since my last injection and feel the emptiness growing in my body. I was unfocused this morning, lacking general direction and passion, just look at how crappy this post is.

Fuck, I don’t like this. I need him to take me, but he can’t right now. How long will his pain last? I want it to end both for him and for me. I’m impatient and trying to cope. What can you expect from a spoiled girl like me? Maybe I’ll try to suck his dick. Maybe he can get off in my mouth. Maybe it’ll release his tension. Maybe I’ll give me what I need.